something interesting that i realized about misato katsuragi is that she’s essentially a reflection of the state of the world. her life is inexorably tied to the angels and their effect on humanity. when she was young, she was ‘whole’, much like humanity was with the angels being dormant, until second impact happens and she loses her father, and likewise the planet loses a sizable amount of its population
in her college and adult years, misato appears playful and lighthearted, but we know that’s just a facade: she’s destroyed by the loss of her father and totally consumed by her revenge against the the angels. likewise, life goes on seemingly undisturbed in tokyo-III, but the damage left behind from second impact and the angels is evidenced in the empty oceans, derelict buildings, and destructive climate change
in 3.0, misato is cold and calculating, lacking any apparent compassion at all. likewise, the world is cold and unforgiving as are its remaining inhabitants. basically each impact heavily alters the landscape of the planet and we see these changes reflected in how misato changes over the course of the series
rei is the most tragic character in evangelion and that has everything to do with her becoming a goddess in eoe
it’s long been established that goddesshood is the pinnacle of femininity, because goddesshood is glorified objecthood: and objects, even divine and powerful ones, can’t be loved - they can be worshipped, idolized, and influential, but evangelion says that love is human and love depends first upon one’s ability to be empathized with. (that’s why it’s called cruel angel’s thesis, btw - angels can’t be loved). goddesshood requires no humanity, no feelings, and an inability to be empathized with, only worshipped and/or feared
when rei – who was already introduced as a girl who had trouble “being human” – becomes a goddess in eoe, she’s essentially carrying out the ultimate goal of femininity by molding herself into a vessel out of gendo’s cathexis, transferred to his son. i already mentioned how gendo symbolizes masculinity in that he is totally dependent on divine feminine energy: in keeping with the child/parent motif, shinji takes gendo’s place and rei appears to him as a goddess. notice when shinji reminisces the “friends he wants to see again”, rei’s head is blocked by shinji’s face (this groupshot includes all the characters who can come back if they want to: hence kaworu’s absence & rei getting literally and metaphorically photobombed by shinji’s smiling face). when asuka and shinji wake up on the beach, rei is a hallucination at best, and a forgotten and lonely spirit at worst
there’s also tragedy in not being a goddess – the “feminine imperfection” symbolized by asuka, misato, and ritsuko. the point is that there is no way for the girls/women to simply BE, to be human (”at least, be human”) without gendered pain. the irony inherent in kaworu, a nonhuman, still being able to choose the circumstances of his death (as the angel of free will) despite his inhumanity is 100% explained by his perceived gender as a boy while rei and the rest of the girls/women are barred from a proper self-determined death
this show is all about people seeking objectifying love instead of humanizing love, and hurting, limiting, and depriving themselves in pursuit of that objectifying love. the (other) point is that everyone needs love, including rei – but rei can never, ever be allowed it